Three things I’m excited about and wanted to share with you all:
1. I’m planning on doing a live event in San Francisco soon. If you’d like to be one of the first to pre-order tickets, Contact Me and I’ll put you on the list.
2. Love the article “How to Navigate a Career Change” a LLB client who left the law for technology just sent in, to share with you the Leave Law Behind audience. The part around how being older can really be an advantage really resonated with me.
3. Want to take a babystep to leave the law? It’s easy – schedule a free 15 minute time to speak with me. We share experiences, we discuss tips on how to leave, and most of all, you’ll realize you’re not alone 🙂
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For many of the clients I work with, leaving the law is not in question: They are so unhappy, unfulfilled, and burned out that there is no question they want to leave. We focus on moving forward to do so.
But others of us aren’t so sure. We find a lot we don’t align with in the practice of law, but there is a lot that does: We may be legal subject matter experts, or just need to refresh the types of clients we work with or need to make more money.
That’s why Adam Ouellette, a Florida licensed attorney, and fellow Leave Law Behind reader, author, and speaker and I have created the podcast called “Love or Leave the Law”. It’s a point/counterpoint format, where we discuss how to (re) love the law again … or find ways to leave it.
And the podcast is inspiring unhappy attorneys just like you to not feel so alone, and to begin to act … which is why Adam and I began the podcast in the first place. One listener wrote in recently to tell us
“Over the weekend I started checking out the videos and listened to the first session of the Love or Leave the Law podcast.
I made a typo in a blog post a few years back, and a number of readers noticed it. They took the time to email me and point out the error I made. It bummed me out that whole day, and as you can tell, I have not forgotten about it …
I may have left the law, but I still battle with the lawyer’s perfectionism. I still bristle sometimes at “constructive” criticism. I still have areas of me that want to be perfect from the outset. I still don’t want to fail.
And the advice many “experts” or motivational speakers give on how to handle failure often isn’t that helpful: embrace failure, failure is the first step to success, you only know what you want from failing, and on and on.
Sure, make sense. But it’s still general, nebulous advice that can be difficult to get our arms around.
And this advice doesn’t lessen the blow at all. Failing hurts. It’s hard to be comfortable with. We lawyers instinctively want to avoid it.
Two kinds of failure
But recently, the value of failure became more clear to me.
I remember asking a client who successfully got an informational interview lined up with a tech CEO how he was able to call the busy CEO and get to talk to him and get time on his calendar.
“I called him” was my client’s response.
He just did it. He called the CEO.
He didn’t let his fear or anxiety or risk of embarrassment make him hesitate or back away from the task at hand.
The Five-Second Rule
It reminds of a great TedX talk from Mel Robbins, CNN correspondent, life coach, motivational speaker and law school grad. In it, she expands on her popular Five-Second Rule.
The Rule says that anytime you have an idea that seems like a sure thing, act to advance it within five seconds. Don’t hem and haw, don’t hesitate, don’t not-act.
Act within 5 seconds. Make the call. Raise your hand. Click the button. Write down the idea.
Something. Do something within 5 seconds of the idea, but just don’t do nothing. Because science has proven that if you don’t act within 5 seconds,
I took Tax Law as a 2L.
I struggled. I was a liberal arts major in undergrad, and was not used to doing problem sets. The professor was renowned, but I was intimidated by him and never went to office hours to improve.
And plus, Tax is just really hard.
I had ignored my homework, so I arrived at school early one morning to get it done before class. I plopped down in a chair at the school cafe, opened up my book, took out the worksheet, and continued to feel totally stumped …
… until I saw a fellow Tax classmate at a nearby table. He sat in the front row, was focused throughout class, answered most questions and was the resident Tax class expert.
He also was a really nice guy. And when I asked him if he had a few minutes to help me with the homework, he happily obliged. He explained the concepts to me clearly and with his help I got them done in less than fifteen minutes.
Wow, I said to him, thank you. If I may ask, how did you get so good at Tax?
I watched a video recently of actor Will Smith speaking about his first sky diving trip.
He talked about how he only agreed to go sky diving after being forced into it over dinner and drinks with a group of friends. They all wanted to go, he didn’t want to be the only one not to go, so he said he was in. Peer pressure even works on famous celebrities.
But he was very afraid of jumping out of the plane.
He was too afraid to sleep. He was too afraid to eat.
The fear was a feeling caused by his belief that jumping out of the plane was going to put him in danger. It was going to cause him pain. Or loss or death or whatever else bad …
The fear of course only grew as he entered the plane. As they climbed to 14,000 feet. As the door opened. As the wind rushed in. As he stood at the edge of doorway.
And then he was pushed.
And as he dropped out of the plane … he said it was the most exhilarating experience he has ever had.
I think you’re going to like one of our recent podcast episodes at “Love or Leave the Law“.
As many of you know, Love or Leave the Law is a point/counterpoint format, where Adam Ouellette (a fellow Leave Law Behind reader, author and founder of www.EsquireAcademy.com) and I discuss how to (re) love the law again … or find ways to leave it.
In this recent episode, we focus on the major obstacles that we unhappy attorneys face in leaving the law.
Deciding to actually leave the law can be a watershed moment in an unhappy attorney’s life. But it also is just the first step of many. In this episode of Love or Leave the Law, Adam and I begin discussing the underlying fears that serve as the main obstacles to leaving the law: The Fear Of the Unknown, the Fear of Risk & Failure and the Fear of Social Disapproval.
I hope you enjoy.
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What’s very unique and strategic about the Leave Law Behind Program we teach, and also somewhat frustrating and drawn out for my clients, is that we do not right away focus on what new (non-law, alternative) jobs to pursue.
Strategic … and (initially) frustrating
This approach is unique and strategic because we want our job search to first be informed by our Unique Genius.
We do not just want to go from one job we don’t like (lawyer) to another job, that may sound kind of interesting, but which we may also not really like that much.
We first need to focus on gaining a deep understanding of our skills and strengths and enjoyments, our Unique Genius, and then let this sincere catalog of what we’re good at inform the next steps we take.
Takes some time and introspection, but almost guarantees we end up focusing on jobs that we really like and that align with our skills.
But this approach can also be frustrating. We attorneys want to know right now what this process will result in. We want to know right now how the end game will play out.
In this week’s video, I touch on how to overcome one of the biggest obstacles we face in trying to leave the law.
I faced it in 2004 when I left the law for good.
And I speak weekly with so many of us who still face it.
The fear and anxiety it causes can stop us in our tracks.
Fortunately, there is a way around it.
Hope you enjoy the video.
Are you serious about leaving the law?
Want to talk with me for free? Go to http://meetme.so/LeaveLawBehind.
Interested in the Online Training Program & Community? Go to http://leavelawbehind.com/online-training.
Want to discuss One to One Coaching? Go to http://leavelawbehind.com/coaching.
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Ask for help. Not because you are weak. But because you want to remain strong.
Les Brown – Motivational speaker, author, and former member of the Ohio House of Representatives
It’s so difficult for us to ask for help
I was speaking with a client last week who I’m helping to leave the law and he said to me at the end of our session, “I’m really happy I put aside my initial apprehension and reached out and asked you for help.”
This comment is so extraordinary in our little part of the Universe because of the simple fact that we attorneys are not inclined to ask for help.
Sure sometimes we can walk down the hall to a colleague in the firm and ask for his or her opinion.
But so many of us sit for long periods of time isolated in our offices, behind a Word document, pushing to complete briefs on our own.
So many of us project an image to the client that we know (or can know) everything.
So many of us work very hard to make sure opposing counsel and the judge think we have the upper hand and that we know what we’re doing.